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CrispTell me you love me
the way you love the sky when it rains.
Would that be a lie?
Then move on, move away,
let my clouds thunder
and my blood pour,
I am sick of this weather
but I'm even more sick of you;
diseased with a molding horizon
dancing along my hips,
I am ready for winter
so let it snow, bitch.
Lostmayday mayday, are you receiving?
is anyone listening, this ship is sinking,
there's blood on the waves, concrete rumors of mutiny.
treason at sea, last words in morse code, anyone..
throwing what's left of our lives on this line.
casting lines returning empty,
the static silence leaves us reeling..
if you're out there:
we can't.. much longer.. this is.. make it home.
tell her.. loved her.. over and out.. we are undone.
Deck of Lies"Pick a card, any card"
He said coyly with a smirk
I bit my tongue and smiled
His playing games was but a quirk
"I pick the 2 of truth"
"Alright, well, you have gorgeous eyes"
I blushed and looked away
This game sent me to new highs
"Umm, Jack of fact"
Smiling, he took my hand
Gave me a wink and said
"Your wish is my command"
Maybe a kiss
Even a hug
The thought gave my mind
The slightest tug
I felt light headed,
High as a kite
A newborn bird
Who had just taken flight
"9 of honesty"
You know I care,
You know I try"
"No. You know I trust you,
You know my secret.
Now 9 of honesty,
Prove you'll keep it"
Unexpected SongSitting in the Study Room
Listening to two students sing
Who are unaware I can hear them
These women with rock-star aspirations
I believe they are trying a karaoke machine
In their small white box with paper-thin walls
What would they think if they knew I had heard
Voices raised half in laughter after just a few words
Of "You're the One That I Want" then an unknown tune?
Deliverancean angel drifts at the edge of the sky
with dwindling wings, she murmurs 'genesis'
and extends her fingers to try
and catch the pieces of a broken world
"sometimes we just need to burn
to have a way to light up the night"
the ground collapses upwards, and the
clouds come tumbling down-- the stars
awake and smile, they set fire to
desiccate all blinded faith
the masses watch on; glazed eyes,
broken spines, excised tongues-- they
are seduced by the twinkling lights
"destruction breeds beauty and
it seems to go both ways"
as the day decays, their time shatters
until those knuckle-dragging fools
find broken moment shrapnel
Hidden SelfSometimes when we laugh
We hide what we be
But down deep there is a place
That only we can see
We share our smile
The glitter in our eye
Except to no one save a few
Do we show our hidden
Sorry Then Safei
we like to play with fire.
as it eats away at our
insipid nature, and licks the
desolate consistency of our bones,
our inner cold is warmed.
you say that it reminds you
of my fevered eyes.
we make scarecrows into humans
into saviors, then tear them down again
for not cleansing out our wounds.
we forget they were only born
to keep the birds from
devouring us further.
and they watch, feebly, as we
fall face-first into our fate
you looked me dead in the eye
"we are all walking ghosts
waiting to die so we can live"
and your whitened hands became
a symbol of achievement
we write our epitaphs the day we're c
diluted evanescencebreezes are fickle things, you said
when your eyes were somewhere far away
the wind danced in the narrow expanse
of all our waning hopes and desires,
and something about the way the air grew static
made me remember a time when
inexperience was still a virtue.
sparks go out, you said
as the discord dimmed
(glossy eyes weren't always
made of glass, but they became
along the line of desperation)
I truly believed the world pulsed somewhere
in the cadence of your voice,
because in your breath- earthquakes would
break and oceans would crash and I always
came up short.
we're living a borrowed life, you said
but no one ever taught u
Fervid AwakeningThere's a fire beneath my feet,
but not the kind that burns
mountains and ruins girls
made of papier-mâchéno,
these are the sparks that
drive the insane to dance in
the rain; the flames that
gave birth to a million voices
itching to be heard, too.
It's spreading, settling, somewhere deep
beneath my sternum, like an anticipatory
story, waiting to be told, giving
my heart the ardor to beat.
No one ever says happiness
is like a butterfly: beautiful,
flighty, and fleeting.
If you let it slip through your
fingersyou are left
alone, palms full of feathery dust
which soon fades and leads to the scary
Blue Smocking in the True Essence of Time"You have no idea what time is going to do to you."
The girl was certainly no older than me, certainly. In fact, she looked at least ten years younger than me, and her dark blue, smock-like top the drugstore chain made her wear at the register made her look even younger and more childish.
If I allowed myself a moment of superficiality right then, I would have said there was nothing special about her: not her hair style, not her face, not her body, not her smile, not her eyes or even the tone of her voice. In fact, there was something slightly non-pleasing about all those elements of her, but I couldn't quite put my finger on exactly why. Maybe everything about her was just a little "off' by the world's standard of what was beautiful and what wasn't. Regardless of that, though, I realized that at 2:00am, when I was the only customer in the store full of everything a person could need at 2:00am, it was an odd thing for her to say to me as I walked in and passed the che
ConfidenceThe mirror said nice things about me today.
But tomorrow it will probably be biased,
And strongly opinionated,
To say otherwise.
I'm Lying To Myself AgainI feel my taste for beauty waning as the days of my lonely life drag on;
Most evenings see me weary, worried, and withered.
Lost in thoughts of a life yet to unfurl, treasures no longer flow from these fingertips;
Yet, still the urge consumes me.
I could, if the need were too unwieldy, resign myself to mediocrity, but
No, perhaps a truer ending than death is in order;
Gone are the days of this poet's fancy
Taken, removed from the passing of time or burned by the flame of my breast,
One final niggling itch ripples through my wounded flesh, begging, screaming to
Make these faithless hands love again.
Your final whisper no long
The Human ConditionI love the Human Condition.
The small sound of the heart beating
as it pushes blood through the veins.
It's so beautiful in its obscurity.
I love the Human Fragility.
The delicate bones
that, with a bit of pressure,
can be reduced to dust.
I love the Human Manipulation.
The way the brain seems to lust
for the destruction
and contamination of others.
I love the Human Emotion.
The crazy things people do
out of fear, love, hate.
With a push, they'll fall into madness.
I love the Human Insanity.
The way humans kill, maim, and hurt
others for no apparent reason
is so very fascinating.
The Human Condition:
in a word
Always and ForeverI will always 'love' you
with every fiber of my being,
with every strand of my soul,
with every beat of your heart.
I will always be there for you,
through the strife
through the pain,
through your 'tragic' death.
I will always protect you.
From the 'heartache'
from the tremors,
from the knife plunged in your spine.
I will always keep you
in my mind
in my heart
in your most tormenting nightmares.
I will always crave you.
No matter how withered your heart becomes.
No matter how distant you seem.
No matter how many blades I force down your throat.
I will forever love you
until your heart stops beating.
until I carve out a
Circus Monster 2I cleared my throat, sure it was just nothing, and thought of the song she always recommended I sing. I was doing well, had gotten out the first verse, when my voice cracked and, it was suddenly gone.
Silence met my ears.
My eyes widened as I tried again. This time I got a few bars out, then my voice broke. People started screaming at me. I tried once more, but it wouldn't work. I wouldn't work.
My legs felt life rubber and I fell to my knees. What was wrong? Why wasn't I working? I tried once more, and failed again. Tears started falling down my cheeks as kept trying to perform, all the while I thought about her. She was the
Circus Monster- 1 My head felt like it was going to explode and I was staring into the faces of three men, all unfamiliar in every aspect. Two of the men were broad and terrifying in their largeness. The third man, the one right in front of me, was smiling at me.
His blue hair was long and hanging in his eyes. His hard blue eyes looked down at me and his elaborate outfit told me exactly who he was: he was a ringmaster.
He crouched down until he was eye level with me, "Hello lovely." He smiled again, his words like acid against my ears. I shied away from him and crawled awkwardly until my back was against the opposite wall of the cage. He just laughed at
Circus Monster- Prologue"Wake up!"
Clang! Metal collided with metal, letting out the ear splitting noise. I sat up quickly and blinked, not sure where exactly I was. Well, that's a lie, I knew exactly where I was.
I was in a cage.
The Horror of Our LoveIt's an unending game of cat a mouse.
I see a flash of your tail,
but you're never really there.
This game had been dragging on,
until I finally found you again.
You have no idea how happy I am.
I look at you, love,
and know everything will be okay,
since you're back at my side.
You don't believe me, do you?
What's with that look in your eyes?
It's like you're afraid of me.
Come on, love,
you know I'd never hurt you.
I love you, after all.
I just can't wait to take you home again,
and we can sit by the fire
like we use to.
What's that you said?
You don't like fire anymore?
That was just an accident.
I hadn't thought you'
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`anmari has been spreading her infectious positivity throughout our community for over 6 years. Throughout this time Ana has been at the core of all things devious, passionately developing an eclectic gallery, helping organise devmeets, participating in chat events and also recently completed dedicating her time as a Community Volunteer. We are absolutely delighted to bestow the Deviousness Award for May 2013 to `anmari, congratulations! Read More